I woke up at 5 a.m. when my blue tinsel, makeshift engagement ring started cutting off circulation in my left finger.
New Year's Eve marked my second date with A.J. in six months. Apparently his persistance paid off, because there I was, drinking congratulatory beers (which makes him seem immensely more interesting and less irritating), after he proposed in front of the whole bar, and wondering how I was going to get out of this one. Will March of 2000-never work for you?
He seems sweet, but his retirement from law enforcement draws a giant, red waving flag. People drawn to this occupation tend to be paranoid, background-check running, computer key logger installing control freaks. None for me, thanks. He talks too much and says things like "chow" instead of dinner, and gives his daughter article 15s, rather than grounding her.
I hate to prematurely decide that someone's not right for me, but there must be some sort of balance between that and agreeing to go out because of feeling obligated and mean if I don't. I detest conflict, but maybe if I could just punch guys I don't want to see again? Would that be too subtle?
For people I've dated but no longer wish to talk to, I change their ringtone on my cell phone to Bob Dylan's "Don't Think Twice, it's Alright." It's starting to be the only one I hear.
[All my mom had to say about my recent engagement? "I should probably call you more often."]
10 comments:
So I take it you are registered at the local Bud Light Distributor?
dammit! I had this hugely hilarious witty comment to post which I promptly lost after losing half a lung laughing at Darrens comment!
I'm a 43 yr old woman with a weak bladder. *curse you Darren*!!
I have been proposed to twice. Once because I got pregnant, and the other because I threatened him with Holy Retribution from God Himself for drinking the milk but not buying the cow.
You have to actually give your admirers ring tones and knuckle marks to separate them from the rest of your admirers...
...sheesh!!
YOU are AMAZING!
oh CQ - likker and rings - not such a good cocktail /methinks
i hear ya on the law enforcement issue - dating anyone in that field is a big RED flag in my mind too
congratulations ???
I was just wondering, what is my ringtone?
A punch to the throat sounds appropriate.
Break out the Rabbit every time you hear that ringtone, you'll miss nothing.
Darren: Well, there and Petsmart. You, m'dear, are "Walking in my Shoes"...
Kat: laughter IS the best medicine...
terri: amazing? Or spineless? Or, perhaps, in need of raising my standards!
Brenda: I failed the lie detector test - looks like I'm free!
Monty: if only that rabbit could cook...
Woot!
In a sense it is a bit sad to use such a beautiful poetic song as your breakup anthem. I like the song so much I fear that I would be tempted to break up with people just to have it brighten my day at random times.
Laoch: what a lovely way to think of it...I will renew my breaking up with vigor! :)
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